I am new here.
I went to the doctor's yesterday and for he first time in my life, I didn't lie about how I felt, I didn't try and be the "other person" that my mind longs to be. No fake smiles, no "I'm fine". It frustrates me so much that I cant speak and say how I truly feel, the words just don't leave my mouth. I took a piece of paper in with scribbles of how I feel, how my mind works, things I've done, recent events etc. My mind is racing and I need to get it off my chest. He said I have bipolar disorder and hypomania. I've got to wait to hear from specialist now and i cant stop thinking about it.