Anxious

Ended up in my bosses office breaking into tears, when being asked what's wrong with me. After seeing my GP diagnosed with depression and going for a cbt assessment in 10 days time.

Work now sending me to occupational health, just feels like that's adding pressure to my depression and increases anxiety.

Anyone else having or had the same ?

I stil manage to attend my work but my performance has declined trying to chase targets, adds to the anxiety as I have not met my targets.

Lost my father in law 2 years ago, then this years has been worse, lost my father in March, then April through to July gone through every test possible for blood and other cancers, stuck me in a negative rut I can't get out of.

Feel a weight slightly lifted for the diagnosis, but slightly anxious about the occupational health thing.

12 Replies

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  • Please don't feel anxious about occupational health..you have been through a lot lately, you need to explain that to them and just be upfront with your feelings...Anxiety and depression are much more common than people realise. Best wishes,

    Anna

  • Hi

    I'm very sorry that you've had a rough time and it's taken its toll. I am pleased you've seen your dr and are on antidepressants, although you've not said how long, what your on and the dose.

    I am on antidepressants too, it took me many times of trying different ones until I found the right one for me. I started at 30mgs and worked up to 90mgs now, I feel they are helping.

    The thing is they take a while to get into your system, usually about 3weeks before you may feel any better. Keep in mind though that you can try others if you feel these arnt helping.

    By coming on this site you're helping yourself so that's good. Get it out of your system, talk about how you feel and cry. Tease help you heal and understand your feelings. Don't feel ashamed more people than we realise suffer from depression and I am sure will be sympathetic.

    I am sure your boss will understand the strain your under. Maybe your dr could sign you off until your meds help?

    Take care and don't give up, there's always help and hope.

    Good luck and best wishes 😊

  • Hi I have been through this in my previous job. In my experience Occupational Health is on your side and wants to help you. You need to tell them everything which you are concerned about and any other health issues too. This is important.

    They will probably ask you what you think could help you ie some work being taken away from you, extra breaks, more sick leave etc. If they agree they will recommend these to your employer.

    It doesn't mean that your employer will agree as this is always subject to 'business needs' but they have to make some 'reasonable adjustments' for you because you have informed your employer of your illness and they have a duty of care towards you under the Health and Safety at Work Act.

    Good luck and let us know how you get on. x

  • My experience of occupational health has been very positive. My manager isn't particularly understanding, willing to say that she feels she should be allowed to discriminate against me and I'm sure she would like to just dismiss me and not have to deal with illness at all. Every time I've been sent to occupational health the report has been very supportive, suggesting adjustments that should be considered, and telling my manager that she is not allowed to do certain things she asked about. I'm not saying it's easy at work now, you can't fix some attitudes, but I feel the occupational health report protected me from being dismissed and still does.

    It might help if you think about what would help you before you go to occupational health. For me time off would be the worst thing, I need to keep busy. It might be that you just need to be allowed a brief time out of the office to calm yourself if you find yourself getting upset, without having to explain yourself in great detail when you return. If you feel you can't complete all your tasks that is also worth mentioning as poor concentration may mean you're taking longer to complete your work than normal. That's not to say your employer will agree but it's better that any suggestions are based on your thoughts about what help you need rather than the generic view of the occupational health advisor.

    If your referral process is the same as mine you'll see the referral letter before it is sent and will have to agree to it. If you want anything corrected, added or clarified mention it before agreeing and only sign when you're happy with it. It's likely that you're being referred because that's the procedure they have to follow. There's the added issue that a lot of managers are completely out of their depth and scared to say the wrong thing when it comes to mental health problems. It's fair enough for your manager to ask for advice, better that than have them respond without advice, get things very wrong, and make you feel worse. I really hope you find it as helpful as I did.

  • Sounds like you have been in exactly the same situation I am in.

    Rather than help my line manager was isn't a people person and can be quite abrupt in her reply's and often in the way she addresses me, almost as though she smells weakness. I keep having performance figures thrown at me and that just adds to a sense of anxiety that I feel, especially as I must then be doing things wrong and get subject to a set of quality audits that essentially had me fail and become shaky and nervous. She raised my referral to occupational health on the back of that.

    For me too I feel the best place is work it gives me a focus and not the time to mull things over. Just need some of the pressure taking off while a deal with the other issues I mentioned.

    I have taken or have tried to take a grip of my circumstances by going to the GP and getting a refferal to a wellbeing clinic for counselling, I was offered prescription meds but feel uncormfortable with that and would rather just go on the counselling route My GP agreed that as an acceptable route.

    Just want to stay in my work with colleagues I like and are supportive, but reduce the stresses I perceive.

  • Yes, I'm in a very similar situation with my manager. She pretends to be supportive when we have meetings with HR which makes it even harder because I know she won't stick to anything she says. It's such a shame that people like that make it to management positions because they're really not suitable.

    It's good that you have other colleagues who are supportive. That will make a big difference.

    Have you heard any more about your referral to occupational health? Have you got a date? Please let us know how you get on.

  • Week today fergus, seen the referral which basically said concerned about my stress and m health as my performance wasn't satisfactory.

    Fault seeking and audit done with a fine tooth comb has exactly helped my level of stress either.

    Although the year I have had full of a cancer investigation over 5'months was listed and a bereavment might have given a clue. !

  • Hi, I'm just wondering how you got on with your occupational health assessment? Do you think it will help the situation at work?

  • He was very good at the occupational health, he thought just themcancer scare would,be enough for most people not to mention 3 bereavements in two years.

    I have attended one session of counselling that my GP set up and it seems it's good to talk and download so to speak.

    Occupational health agreed and suggested some mentoring and support from work should help till my self confidence improves ( which had been shot from "over management")

    Slowly feeling better.

  • Hi, I saw some advice you posted for someone else and thought you said many wise words. So I thought I would say hello. hope your doing ok, anytime you wanna chat, get in touch,

    L

  • Likewise, learning how to combat it myself depression that is, never knowingly had it in the past, but not a great experience, talk seems to be one of the best cures and realising your thoughts. Trying to stay away from negative thoughts and negative folk.

    And it's helping

  • hi, thanks for getting back to me, always nice to make contact. Im also at work but finding it a struggle. trying to get through hour by hour, day by day. been to see my doctor last week and back on the meds so hopefully they'll help a little.

    hope things are going ok for you

    Lee

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