Hi guys, bit of an update.
So didn't want to get too excited and post last week but with mixed results I went back to work last week.
Work have been great, but It has been so hard. I am seriously having trouble concentrating and my productivity is so low. Little things that I used to deal with routinely scare me and it feels like I have dropped half of my IQ.
I don't want to be a 'presentee' and the guilt is crushing. I just want to go in and do a good days work like I used to.
I know that this is all negative, I am just so tired. When I first posted three or so weeks ago I was in the middle of a breakdown and could barely function so have come so far.
It is just hard to be pleased with myself for just getting out to work when other people are cracking on, it makes me feel pathetic and a failure (especially when people have far tougher lives than I do).
I know that I have got to fight this but it seems like such a big mountain to climb and I think my rope is frayed, my ice axe is rusty and my boots have seen better days.
Going to try again tomorrow. Now I am just going to try and do my best to relax.
Thanks for all your support.