Depression is winning, no chance of improving!

Hello, I am new to this site and have found it interesting reading others struggles.

I have battled depression, stress and anxiety for about 10 years now, the last 8 have been okay, a few bad days each year but I have been able to plod on and wear the mask to the outside world that all is okay. However, personal circumstances are such that no matter what I try to do I know I cannot recover. Two years ago, I struggled doing stuff even when I wanted to, I was aching, tired all the time and lethargic, my GP first linked it all to depression but I kept saying it wasnt because I was actually feeling okay and eager to do stuff but physically cannot. My GP now says it's fibromyalgia.

I have had to have time off work and now the depression has returned big time as my elderly father has become unwell and I have to try and care for him also!

I believe in all the advice re; healthy eating, exercise, mindfulness, etc but how can it help when finances are dire and family responsibilities are stressful!

My husband tries to understand but just believes me going to work is the most important factor. Yes, I need to work and don't want to have depression but I have tried doing this but I have now crashed! I havd tried counselling, CBT, drugs but none help you live each day when you are drowning in debt and physically struggling with life due to family commitments! We are having to sell our home and downsize to pay off debts that have accumulated over the years.

Apologies for the long rant but I am my wits end literally!

5 Replies

  • Hello millymolly3 and a warm welcome to the Action on Depression Forum. You will find our members friendly and supportive :-)


  • Hello, thanks fir your reply but I have to ask, where is the support?

    No one has replied, except yourself.. i posted because I was feeling desperate, I have tried, MIND, Samaritans etc so I thought I would try this forum to be in contact with others who can hopefully understand and offer support and advice :(

    Its embarrassing posting personal stuff but worse when you get no response!

    Sorry this is negative but when you are trying to get help and you keep hitting brick walls, it doesnt help the situation, its harder to keep going so you feek like, whats the point!

  • Hi millymolly3

    Welcome to the site, I've only just seen your message as I'm not online everyday, or I would have replied earlier!

    Sounds like you're going through a pretty rough time! I have fibromyalgia, depression & anxiety amongst a few other conditions.

    Fibro & depression are not easy to deal with at the best of times, especially when you're trying to work & keep a regular home life going and having to look after your Father too!

    Fibromyalgia from experience is difficult to diagnose & have found that depending which specialist or Doctor that you see, can depend on what diagnosis you get for the symptoms you have! I had a lot of time off work due to my physical & mental health being unstable & ended up being medically retired at 39 (now I'm a Pensioner!)

    I'm not saying anything like that is going to happen to you by any means, but as far a the physical & depression I know how you feel, I also know how difficult it is to get family to understand, how both conditions can impact on our ability to live a regular life when, consumed consistently by pain & difficult thoughts & working Taking on looking after your father as well along with these conditions, & working, I can imagine is really difficult & extremely painful & tiring! How you do it I don't know? But the fact is you are doing it despite what you are going through daily! I often can't get out of bed with the tiredness, exhaustion & lethargy of Fibro! So coping, even if it is just hanging by a thread shows you have a stronger inner strength, & determination! You say you have crashed, but you're not completely broken and looking for available support such as coming on the site & sharing will hopefully help! Feel free to pm me if you want to & I will try to get back to you ASAP when I get online please forgive me if my reply is not immediate.

    Take Care millymolly3. spykey

  • Spykey...thank you so much for replying, it means so much just to know I am not alone and someone understands. I often feel I am going mad and cannot go on anymore because I am trying to sort it all out but no avail!

    Take care yourself...speak again soon!

  • Hi Millymolly3

    Feel free to pm me if you need to it want to talk anytime! You will never be alone, even if you're having a rough day, don't be afraid to post! There are others on the site who honestly do care and hopefully they will see your messages & reply too!

    There are such a lot of posts going through the site and yours seems to have not come/slipped through & not been spotted or people don't what to say! Anyway I am glad to have spotted your post today & I will try to support in the best way I can!

    Take Lots of Care & try not too wear yourself out too much, it is important to take breaks when your body tells you to, or you deserve to take breaks. As you know overdoing it can affect you the next day especially with everything you are trying to do!

    Take Lots of Care. spykey

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