Bad times

I've had a really rough few weeks.

I've gone back to work, I'm arguing 24/7 with my partner and I'm moving house which financially we can't afford atm.

So, back at work and this week has been horrendous. I got sent home yesterday for having a meltdown whilst in a meeting (good impression eh?). I can't even describe this week. It's been a bag if shhhhhhht. I can't get myself out of bed or anything.

Me and my partner are going through a rough time. We spoke Sunday and he finally told me that he's stressed and down about everything. Hers been off work for quite a few weeks with an injury and his SSP won't even cover his outgoings for a start. I thought we made up and everything was fine but it hasn't. He won't speak to me. He's been so off with me. I don't know what to do because I'm impatient with how I'm feeling now and it's getting to me.

The move. Everything that could go wrong has gone wrong. Money, moving, furniture... you name it, it's freaking gone wrong!

I don't care about anything else, I'm just fed up of how much of an impact I'm being on my partner. I feel like a burden. I just want to disappear. I don't see a way out anymore. It's so hard to cope right now.

3 Replies

  • It sounds like you've put yourself under too much pressure too soon. We will all have difficult times and they feel like they're going on forever, but in hind sight they're never as bad as they seem at the time. Try and make some time for you and your partner to spend together to reconnect. I've heard that recreating your first date is a good one or maybe try some counselling. There's a charity called Relate that can help with this. Hope this helps

  • Hello

    When we purchase a new property we all feel the same way, stressed.

    If the property is near to our limit again that can start to make your hair stand on end.

    Moving in and finalizing the sale can also also cause problems especially if this is a move in date that consists of multi sales and other purchasers who are most probably feeling the same way as it is very rare you will sell to a White Night.

    All I can suggest if the world is falling around your ears, I understand you have problems with your work and are scratching the walls with your mate you may need to reconsider the sale, if at all possible. If all can be sorted and things are more positive it is possible all will settle and once in the warm glow of home ownership will or should bring you both back together

    If your home loan it may be possible to be rescheduled over a longer period, of time. Consider I suppose a bridging loan to give you the chance of having more time to make the sale. Although I do not know your circumstances.

    Possibly if the relationship is so patchy a visit to RELATE could be a good way forward.

    If you feel you need to see your GP because of the stress. This could dumb you down and help you sort out your problems.

    I am not a financial adviser although many on site would most probably understand the stress you are under at this time


  • Certainly sounds a rough few weeks ,Lawren. As they used to say "if it got any worser it would be better".

    I don't understand work these days , people keep posting they have meltdowns (whatever one of those is) and then they get sent home. Sounds more like school. If it was me I'd be saving up all my meltdowns for Wimbledon or the euro football finals . Anyway you've done very well to get back to work and I don't suppose they'll be expecting you to be a female Gary Cooper yet. He was the strong silent type usually in cowboy films , most famously the sheriff in High Noon, in case you're too young to remember him.

    The house thing is a more real worry but unless you're super rich there's no way round this as it's always a stressful time. For everyone ,not just you and your partner. The only way round this is to call it off, but I don't suppose you really want to do this.

    Your partner sounds as if he's feeling the strain even more than you and if he's off work, he probably feels a bit guilty on top of this and has more time to brood about it. I would try and be extra nice to him , and with any luck he'll be nicer back. If that does n't work be nicer still. When you're going through the stress of a house move its very important you support each other. Its a bad enough time without 24/7 rows.

    You don't sound to me as if you've lost your sense of humour despite all these problems and i hope everything turns out much better than you expect. It would be hard for anyone to cope with returning to work after depression and with a house move on top of this . You probably can't do anything about those two things but you can do something about the rows with your partner. It might be that he needs your support more right now so try and give this and hopefully things will improve between you. Once you're supporting each other the house worries and problems at work will seem quite a bit smaller. If you take the initative in improving things between you ,you certainly should n't feel a will be easier to cope,and you might not be so concerned about finding a way out.


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