I'm a 33 yr old man, I've came on this forum cos I need help! I've been struggling along for 4 and half years without taking any medication, just hate pills in general! since the loss of my dad I have really been struggling. My relationship has been affected, I've became a recluse from my family and stopped talking to them altogether. I can't talk to my partner as I fear she's cheating on me and if I do talk to her then this could be the end of our relationship. I know I have put a considerable amount of weight on but she keeps reminding me, dropping hints and then blatantly coming out with it. I mean she's put weight on since having our daughter but I never said a thing!!! She's had a thing with a guy in her work and still works with him! This is what makes more paranoid than anything! This has affected my sexual relationship too. She never wants to do anything! I feel so insecure with my body!!! It's a struggle to get a hug and right now writing this post anonymously I feel weak as I'm crying my heart out! I need a hug. Some days I just can't cope and lie to her that I'm working late, I sit at the crematorium where scattered my dads ashes and just cry. I've called breathing spaces and spoken to a few advisors but they all say the same thing, maybe this time it'll be different! Any advice?