Lonliness

I've been cut off from my family recently and I don't really feel like I'm as close to friends as I use too, I could heart on heart say I have two people that make sure that I'm okay and make effort, even at work I feel useless, it's got to a point where I can't get out of bed or sleep and I ring in I'll all the time and if I'm not doing that I'm getting up half hour before I start work,I've only just started to realise after all these months that I'm not right and I don't know what to do, any advise?:(

9 Replies

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  • Hi

    You sound really down. You say you have been cut off from your family. I am wondering about the reason for this. Moving away from family can be hard but if it is something else like a disagreement it can be even harder. In either case it's understandable to be finding things difficult. It is really good that you have two people who are interested in your wellbeing. It is also understandable that you are feeling isolated. I am wondering how long this has been going on? If it is quite a while then maybe a visit to the GP is necessary. Medication can help but it is always a good idea to find a counsellor as well. I know it's hard when you feel down, but getting out can help. Maybe a a short trip to the shops or a walk in the park. The usual of eating regularly and sleeping also helps. Drops in blood sugar can make people feel really down. If you are having trouble sleeping then maybe a Relaxation CD would help. I wish you well.

    Ally

  • I'd definitely suggest a visit to a GP.

    Just a thought for you ..... You say there are only 2 people who look out for you. Think about who the people are who you look out for as well. Contact them today and find out how they are. Its remarkable how doing something for someone else can raise your mood . Even if for a short while. And they will feel good because someone is showing they care. As I say worth trying

    Best of luck

    Dee

  • Hi, Sorry you are feeling like this. It took me over a year feeling some of the way you do before I eventually went to the doctor, took a series of bad migraines and nightmares before I caught help. I agree with the advice Ally and Dee have given you. I Know you won't feel like it but getting out does help make sure you get fresh air regularly. I found mindfulness has helped me as well as the medication the doctor has me on. I also did a stress control class that my local NHS service was running for free. We covered a lot of things including dealing with being unable to sleep, one of the tips they gave was to set up a nightly routine and stick to it. Go to bed at the same time every night and if you don't feel tired get up and do something relaxing (listen to relaxing music or read a calming book, try relaxation CDs) once you fee tired again go back to bed. There was a lot of other tips and as a last resort there was a way on how to reset your body clock as well, which was quite intense. Check out your local health service and see if they have any courses of places you can go for advise.

    I wish you'll, you are not alone and try to get out and about. Eat healthy and contact your friends rather than waiting on them contacting you. Try and concentrate on the positives in your life, yes there are some in on the bad days.

    Once you feel up to it maybe join a club and make new friends.

    Take care and I hope this helps.

  • Hi there.You seem to be very depressed and maybe could use some help from your GP. That first appointment could be your way back from your dark place. Wishing you luck and better days ahead.

  • Hello, sian12. Loneliness is one of the worst feelings in the world. I have suffered from it too. The serious side to it is that it can lead to clinical depression where you are not able to do the things you know you should do to make you feel better.

    I am not a doctor and cannot prescribe for you. I can only tell you what helped me.

    My loneliness was the result of 2 close bereavements in the space of 3 months. It knocked me for six. I couldn't stop crying. The result was severe depression. That in turn led to me not being able to eat due to anxiety. My doctor gave me a SHORT course of Diazepam--only about 10 days. I had lost half a stone in one week. As a result, I could eat and the anxiety disappeared. I also had visits in my home from a psychiatric nurse once a week for a month or so. People told me to get out of the house but I was terrified of that in case I took a panic attack in the supermarket. Also I didn't have the physical strength to leave the house .

    It is very important to do things in the right order. The nurse visits were really good as I got professional, realiable advice and she was good company.

    I don't know if you are depressed as well as lonely but, if you are, see your GP, explain how you feel and take advice. I hope your doctor is good at his job and sets you on the right path--in the right order-- to a calmer and happier future. Seek help now. Kind regards, Myra.x.

  • Not sure what you mean by getting cut off from your family but are you feeling bad because you are homesick. You say you have only 2 friends that care about you. You are lucky. Lot of people cannot say that. You don't have to be lonely . People are not going to come knocking at your door to be a friend. You need to get out there and be friendly, nice and smile. You will get positive results. With the two friends that you have, are you being a friend to them. Think of others and don't focus on yourself. Don't burden your friends by talking about you all the time. A positive attitude attracts people . If you see someone at work that looks down or sad, smile, say hello and ask how they are and really show you care. You are responsible for you so do all you can to be the person that people like to talk to, have lunch with or even take walks with. I hope you find many people that you can talk to. I hope you stay in touch with your family. Family is important. Call them often. Our mind, mouth and attitude really affects our lives.

  • I guess I've felt this way from time to time but as there are so many of us out there using this sight, it's safe to say to you that you are not alone. You have all of us. Sometimes I've just wanted to vent into space about how I feel to no one in particular - just had to get it out. I care about you even though I have never met you because I know how it is to feel so low. So keep your chin up. You are just as good and valuable as anyone else out there.

    As I age, I start to feel that I really don't care what people out there think about me. I am a good person and I know it and that's all that really counts to me right now.

    I am off my meds and all my true feelings are coming to surface and I want to deal with them and not mask them anymore with antidepressants.

    I believe everyone in this world has ups and downs and very, low lows at time. So, pick yourself up, dust off your pants and keep on trucking.!!

  • I feel exactly the same . Every thing is a massive efought. Everything .

    I stay in most days go out shopping maybe once a week.

    Sounds like depression. I am on tablets for it but I am still not doing things I used to. I have forgot how to be me or should I say I can't be bothered being me anymore .

    I hope ur OK . I would go to the docs. And maybe speek to the people u have close .

    I have no one in family ( apart from my kids anything I do do is just for them cuz there young ) and I don't bother with my friends much they have there own life's and my best friend died in April.

    I hope u find happiness again cuz u can trely say I havent been happy in years

  • Get yourself to the gp and discuss this with him or her . Negativity or a negative situation can play with your emotions that can cause bad nerves. Avoiding people and sleeping all the time is a sign of depression and your gp will be able to advise you on options once he has confirmed diagnosis . My advice take a break from the norm and sort yourself out don't worry about other people and there actions as this will make you worse . Your gp may offer cbt thearpy or something else you need to make the appointment so you can start to get yourself sorted . Good luck

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