As my title states I am in dire need of support and guidance. I am turning 50 this week and my life has been a mess for the past 8 years...my problems started when I resided in the canadian arctic and came across a boss that mentally harassed me I assume due to my sexuality. I worked for a government organization, myself and my coworker who was also a lesbian were constantly being harassed by this individual. Unfortunately it was too much for her to bear and she committed suicide. After her death the harassment continued towards me. A mutual friend of my coworkers couldn't deal with the suicide and attempted to suicide herself as well and I found her. As a result I was told by the medical profession that I needed to leave the territory for medical reasons. I relocated to southern canada and couldn't assimilate as a result I isolated myself in my home. I eventually met a special lady that helped me and we were together in a relationship for 2 and a half years. She began hiding and drinking alcohol and told me she had a brain tumour which was not true...so we broke up. Since our recent breakup I feel completely num and hopeless. My life consists of medical appointments and I am unable to work due to my depression. I should mention that I speant 10 years in the arctic and coming back has felt like I've relocated to a different planet. I have very few people that understand me and those that don't just fluff my problems away...I am completely alone with my thoughts other than communications wit my phsychiatrist and phsycologist. I also am dealing with a law suit against the government organization and all is just taking so long that I keep on reliving the harm that was done to me...my days are very dark and I'm not sure I can deal with life any longer...does anyone have any suggestions or words of encouragement for me...? I should also add that I've been diagnosed with ptsd as a result of my northern experience
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