hi there guys im new on here,
Im 18 years old and i feel that i have depression im constantly sad i feel like im not good enough im not smart enough i cant do anything and i give up real quick. im not happy with my self nor nothing. I live with my partner we have been together for 3 years now but we have been though ALOT and its mainly the same reason. I have quick outburst of anger esph when it comes to money because i feel that im constantly lending money to my partner and she also complains that she had to buy cat food and food to eat which annoys me so much because i dont understand. she is on a higher wage then me and it just leaves me broke for the month and this stresses me out a lot. this then all lead to the sexual side of a relationship, i love my fiancee so much but i dont always show it in the bedroom and i dont know why i just feel sad and unhappy sometimes i cry myself to sleep or just have unbroken sleep. Also when i get into bed or any type of comfort i have this issue of scratching my left leg raw red with cuts and blood everything and i cant help it and this is also another thing stressing me out because i used to love my legs but now there just a image of what i feel like inside. now my partner saying she is not interested im selfish im this and im that and all i can think to do is run , just run away just so no one would find me. i work monday to friday and i have to spend 3 hours of my day travelling to and from work and i just feel so lonely. when i get home it doesn't change but my partner just says it me and how im not affectionate and i question myself is this the truth ?? now im just lost i dont know where to go and i feel like im getting eaten from the inside out. everyday i wake up i feel like im not only putting on clothes but im also putting on a mask. I used to be Happy but now im just always down and i really need help.
im thankful for any type of help. xx
thank you x