Hi guys just little old me typing away again..
Can't seem to stop crying... It's so annoying! I'm literally crying over the smallest things lately.. I feel... Strange if that's the right word?
I know I should be so happy that I'm starting my new job and its gunna be a start to the life I want.. But I just can't seem to pick myself up!
I was so happy a few weeks ago.. But I really did feel so happy.. It felt like that after everything I had been through I was finally getting my rewards.. And now.. Well I just feel so low and sad I just can't take it anymore! I hate that I can't seem to just shout at myself and tell myself to stop being so sad and be happy for once! I get so frustrated with myself I then just sit and cry for hours!
I don't actually know how to be happy.. I've tried getting out the house.. Going shopping.. Got out of town the other day and just sat in chester by the water.. But I just can't seem to be happy... And I don't know what it is that I'm doing wrong "/
I know I've probably said this on all of my posts.. But this time I mean it.. And I think I'm going to drag myself to the doctors... Monday morning I want to be in that waiting room and speaking to my doctor!
The only thing is.. Where do I even begin to tell him how I'm feeling? Do I just go in and say 'I've been feeling sad lately'? I'm scared that if I tell him I hurt myself is he going to send me off to the people in white coats? I'm not sure how this works? So if anyone has any advice as to where I can start that would be very much appreciated..
I think if I get myself to the doctors on Monday.. I should hopefully feel better that I've got on the right path and then maybe I will start to feel happy again?
Sorry for the long post guys just having my little ramble of the day..
Hope everyone is feeling ok here if anyone wants a chat