Is it me?

At just ovet 50 l wonder what l have done with my life and very little to show for it. Hardly anything goes right and it's an effort to pick myself up. Getting a job, feeling unattractive, trying to loose weight and semi looking after my parents. I am due to get my tablets reviewed at my GP next month citalopram 40mg which l have been on for nearly a year. Is it just me?

15 Replies

  • hi tree hugger youve defo concentrating on the negative parts of you past ! try and think more of the good things you have achevied in you life ! when you go to your gp be open and honest that way your gp will be able to tailor your treatment better ! stick with what suits you better ! take care david

  • Hi David

    Thanks for your support. Not sure what my GP can do. I feel in a world of my own. Don't want to talk to anyone, miserable on my own and with people, patience is short, it just goes round and around!

    Well today is another day.

  • Hi Tree Hugger sorry your feeling like this, I can totally empathise

    With you as last night I was feeling a bit like this. Old and Alone and parents

    Died 10 yrs ago. Rest of my family don't visit or contact. Now I am slim so

    That's SomethIng. Lol .

    I don't want to make your post about me, but we all feel like this at

    Times, I would get GP to do a full checkup as well, maybe your anaemic.

    Have you joined a slimming group, they have a good one on NHS site.

    Make a list of what you would like to change in your life and then

    See what you can do. Remember you have choices and we can all

    Improve our lives if we make an effort. Something's we cannot change

    But try and take this day by day and above all be compassionate to

    Yourself and do nice little things for yourself.

    Message me any time for a moan or a bit of support. This is a great Forum for

    A bit of support. Make sure and tell your Dr. Exactly how you feel.

    Hannah. X

  • Hi Hannah

    Thank you for your email. It's nice to know that there are lovely people on this site. My GP is understanding but l feel a embarrassed and useless when l have my appointment in two weeks time. Was tired today went to bed for 10 pm up every few hours .

  • Hi, I know how you feel. I'm only 24 but I do actually feel this way. I have a degree which I'm not using and probably never will. I have Asperger's Syndrome which I feel holds me back from a lot. Every guy I've ever asked out has said no, including a recent one I wanted to get to know better. And bf's have always dumped me. So yeah, you're not alone. Even though I'm still "young" I don't think there's anything out there for me. Maybe if I'm lucky one day I will manage to get out of my parent's house for a shared ownership flat. I feel there is not much point in trying in life, I just get knocked back down.

    I don't know why guys are so put off by me. Maybe it's something they're picking up on, maybe it's a vibe I give off without realising, maybe it's the AS. My life pretty much sucks tbh. My parents are getting tired of having me around, we all have different schedules and the house is basically too small for all of us. The only things I can be thankful for are having a place to sleep, a minimum wage job and my car. My car is what's saving me right now actually - it gives me that bit of independence so I can disappear to the cinema at the weekends on my own for the day. I don't like arranging to go out with people because they always pull out and it leaves me feeling disappointed.

    But this is life. Everything in life is an anti-climax really :(. So we have to just re-focus the way we think. For example, try not to expect too much from life because there isn't much available. The worst thing anyone can gove you is false hope. I had false hope recently and it just leads you to come crashing down. It's hard not to hope that things will get better as it's part of out nature. But I find I'm happier when I don't expect anything and just try to be content with what I do have. Well, I'm not happy as such, but I'm less miserable than when I try for something and fail. Thise are the worst parts of life. So I've found it's easier to accept certain things. And I think I'm starting to believe that I won't meet anyone who will love me back.

    But we just have to hang in there I guess.

  • Thank you for your email. Your correspondence makes sense. Sometimes think wouldn't it be nice to start again with a new identity.

  • Haha yes, but we'd probably mess it up ;). And even if we made all the right choices, someone else would mess it up for us haha x

  • Hi I've just seen your post, I just wanted to say for a 24 year old you are very wise and mature and your parents should be very proud of you. It was a pleasure to read your post. I hope things pick up for you and you get all that you wish for xxxxx

  • Aww thank you, I appreciate that :). I don't think my parents see this insight I have. I don't know, parents are parents, blood runs thicker than water. Somtimes I just try to limit my contact with them lol.

    Sorry for the late reply, been doing overtime at work and it was crazy busy yesterday!

    Shared ownership prospects are pretty grim unfortunately as it is no longer being funded by the govt but maybe they will fund a new scheme sometimes in the future.

    The average rent around the area I live in anout 700-800 which I couldn't possibly afford on top of council tax and bills. I don't know who landlors think can actually pay that for a one bedroom flat! But at leats I'm not homeless I guess xx

  • Hi there, good to hear from you,it's hard sometimes with parents. But they love you, might not understand you, but you must believe in yourself. You have a lot to offer! Rent is astronomical, I don't know how people manage?? Like you say at least your not homeless. I hope things get better for you, message me anytime. Happy to chat and give support. I'm feeling so tired so I'm going to snuggle up with a film and relax. I work in a pre school so am kept pretty busy! Luckily I love my job and work with nice people. It does help. Best wishes. Xxxxx

  • That's great you like your job! :). Kids are such energy suckers! Haha. I can find kids fun but they zapp my energy.

    People at my work generally get along besides the odd outburst when tension is high. I have a good boss too. He usually lets you take time off if you need it and will let you make it back up which is great :). I'm going to view a flat tomorrow so leaving work a bit early for that. I'm working until 8pm tonight so can't wait to be in bed later haha. I am off on Monday though as it is bank holiday so long weekend here I come!! :) xxx

  • Hello Hugger

    We all take medications I have taken Citalopram now for ten years I have taken these types of drugs since 1968, on and off up till now.

    I suffer a chronic pain condition since about 1983 and have to take extensive medications for that. I even need to take a further medications of the same group to control nerve damage. My supper and breakfast is very chemical and I will never be able to sop them now as I am as good as sixty five.

    I was medically retired decades ago and it was something I had to get used to. I do voluntary work for the NHS and GP surgery and granted that will not make me better it does help me approach life a little bit more positive.

    One problem I suffer is over weight and no matter what I do I have problems controlling it. Again this is part of my illness and I am unable to do much about it.

    Having a chronic disability is a real eye opener, personally although no-one has told me my medications will eventually will see me out

    Basically you ask is it just me, all I can say regards that is try and make things better . Get interests. and try not to dwell on life with its little kick backs

    All the best


  • Thanks Bob for your reply. It's not easy trying to believe in yourself. Had a horrid day yesterday hoping today will be kinder. Not sleeping doesn't help even though you're tired.

    Well speak to you later.


  • If you are not sleeping you could look at the medications you take, then alter the times you take them.

    This can help you deal with day time feelings and also help you sleep. The idea is use the contraindication as an aid of sleep and then further drugs will help more to get through the day.

    With my medications this is what I do, it prevents me being flat in the mornings.


  • No it's not just you! I have the same feelings, so I can relate to how you feel. I'm on 10mg of citalopram and may go up to 20? I spend a lot of time supporting my mum as she lost her husband recently. don't get me wrong I want to be there for her, but I feel my life is passing me by. I'm sorry you feel depressed.its not a good feeling is it? But remember your not alone,I imagine you feel alone with these feelings as I do. There is so much pressure today. I'm 57 and I do a lot of walking which helps me and try and get out with friends as much as I can. Hope you get some more support. Evelyn

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