Hi everyone, I'm an 18 year old male, who is uncertain and in need of help. I'm not sure if my symptoms are a sign of depression or if everyone suffers from this, but for the past 10 months or so I have felt very down and detached. I have lost a lot of motivation recently and have stopped following what was once my passion, football. I used to play every week and watch it constantly however I do not find it, or anything else for that matter, as enjoyable as I used to.
I've also noticed that I struggle to get to sleep most nights and spend many hours lying in my bed thinking about some very dark things. I do not speak to many of my friends as much as I used to and I cannot face talking to them about how I feel, they wouldn't understand. It's a similar story with my parents, whom i still live with as I'm still in full time education, I can't face telling them that I feel so down, I don't want to disappoint them more than I already have. For the first time last night I seriously thought about ending my own life, and only by lack of courage to do so am I still here. No one who knows me understands. Perhaps the worst part about all of this is that I cannot find any clear reason as to why I feel so low and how can I make people understand?