Ho hum

Today (well yesterday I suppose as its 1.42 am now) started very well. Took the kids shopping and we had hot chocolate and cake for a special treat. Went home to do some wrapping with a view to spending the afternoon delivering pressies and visiting friends.

Call from my Dad asking me to go down as Mum wasn't well. Told the kids I'd be an hour and they asked to stay in the house and watch a film.

The next hour or two went by in a bit of a bit of a daze. Mum had a stroke, the doctor had to get her to hospital under some clause of the mental health act because she was refusing to go, the kids ended up dumped off with a neighbour and I had my first ride in an ambulance.

Didn't get home until 1am. Katie was asleep and Joe had waited up for me. He was so sensible and was clearly concernd about his Gran, but I could sense the disappointment in his voice.

Mum is on the stroke ward now. They asked my brother and I to discuss a DNR with other family members. Ultimately it has to be my Dad's decision, as her next of kin, but that's another conversation for another time.

So if I'm not around much over the next few days, I'll be either at the hospital or trying to make my children not hate me. Either way, I'll be thinking of you all and I hope that each and every one of you has a brilliant Christmas.

Lucy xx

14 Replies

  • hi lucy hope.your cool merry christ xx

  • Hi Lucy,

    Sorry to read about your mum, I'm sure your children understand the situation and love you very much.

    I'll keep you in my thoughts this Christmas, I hope it's not too stressful for you.


  • Lucy what a terribly stressful time for you. I went through very similar with my mum as you know; she was in hospital for 6 weeks and it was a nightmare rollercoaster of events, decisions, family dynamics, seeing so many people in so much desperate pain and being unable to help; so my thoughts and prayers are with you.

    Be kind to yourself Lucy; that is the most important thing; and aknowledge the immense emotional impact this is bound to have on you with all the stress you are under and all how things have been and are with you all.

    Gemma X

  • Oh Lucy

    I am so sorry you had such a disruptive day yesterday and that your mum is so poorly, strokes are no fun and added to her other problems I guess it will be impossible for your dad to cope. Let's hope your dad agrees DNR if that's what you hope for as well, it would probably be a blessing for everyone.

    I'll be thinking of you too and hope things go as well as they can for you over the holiday period. You know your children will not hate you, they will just be cross and a bit disappointed, but they will understand, you do a brilliant job with them :)

    All the best for now, and update us all when you can.


  • Oh Lucy,

    All I can do is echo Sue's comments. You do a wonderful job juggling everything at the moment and still functioning. As Gemma says you are under immense stress and must be emotionally empty almost.

    I'll think of you over Christmas. Much love to you and your family,

    Sarah x

  • Happy Christmas Sarah, hope you are ok, are you doing anything good during the holiday period? xx

  • I'm okay, not up to much over Christmas. My other half wants to stay at home so we have my mother in law coming over. Only thing is we have no tree because of the puppy. He will launch himself at it or eat all the decorations. So doesn't seem very Christmassy. Your decorations look lovely!

    Hope you had a wonderful time with your daughter and her new hubby.

    What are you up to over Christmas?

    Sarah xx

    PS I realised the other week that second hand rose is a song from Funny Girl. Are you a Barbara Streisand fan?

  • Hi Sarah

    I once had a cat who used to eat the tree decorations, and

    Then puke them up at the mist awkward times. I have XmS Cards

    Hanging on wall with one or two felt birds, Last night I saw LUNA

    Eyeing the birds and trying to pull at them.

    Take it easy and be good to yourself.

    Hannah xx

  • Lol. Ahh don't you love them anyway? Oscar usually does a poo at the most inopportune moments. That is his party trick. Hannah, have a lovely Christmas and look after yourself.

    Sarah xx

  • Sarah

    Have a lovely XmAs Day and enjoy cuddles

    With Oscar.

    Hannah x

  • Hi Lucy

    I echo everyone else's sentiments. You are amazing and it's a very tough time

    For you. Your children will bring some joy into this tense time. Try and get a little

    Time each day to do something nice for yourself.

    Lucy I agree about DNR , my own late Mother agreed with that too, even though

    She was 87.

    Talk whenever you get. Chance, will be thinking of you .

    Hannah xx

  • hope everything goes well, joe sounds like a nice boy, I'm sure he'll understand . Take care of yourself and try to get something from christmas.

  • Hi Lucy so sorry to hear about your poor mum. Stay strong and positive and I hope you manage to have a good Christmas anyway. Am thinking of you. Hugs

    Bev xx

  • Hey thanks everyone, it was such a nice surprise to log in and read everyone's reples. Took some clothes up to Mum at hospital and she was lying in the bed crying in pain. I can't even begin to imagine how much pain someone as tough as her would have to be in to be so sad. My Dad went to see her this afternoon and he said she was quite jovial. Apparently she was giving him instructions on how to cook the Turkey. In some ways that made me feel even more sad, because it shows that she is aware of what she's missing. I went up again this evening and she was was sleeping. But not a peaceful sleep; a sleep where you could see she was suffering. I didnt want her waking up thinking no one had visited, so I wrote her a little note and stuck it to the table next to her bed. I feel sad thinking about her waking up on her own in hospital on Christmas morning, but I know she's in the best place getting the care that she needs.

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