worried to see a doc!

Hi

My names Andy am 26 my depression started about three months ago. Work was getting to stressful my gf just gave birth to my little girl but I just didn't feel happy. About three weeks ago my mate died then the day after the funeral my other friend died. Two days ago I lost my job. So now am worried all time about money and just everything don't want to leave house can't sleep my friends and family don't like to talk about depression and my gf keeps saying see a doc but am kind of scared too any advice sorry to talk about this but needed to let it out. Thanks

11 Replies

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  • What a very stressful time you are suffering, no wonder you feel the need to let it all out. Try not to feel scared about seeing your gp. The feelings you have are expected to happen for someone in your position and the docs will not judge you. You may need medication and/or counselling. You are not alone and keep posting on here whenever you need to. Be kind to yourself x

  • Please see your GP. You have been through a lot. He will probably put you on an anti depressant. This won't solve your problems but it might take the edge off things. Good luck

  • Maisie, you've responded to me by mistake instead of the original poster!

  • Sorry

  • Never apologise for taking about how you feel, it's the best way to sort your thoughts and feelings out. If you're not sure about talking to your gp, why not mention it to your babies health visitor. She will be able to point you in the right direction and there may even be groups for dad's with post natal depression. I know yours isn't centered around the birth of your daughter, but you've had so many huge life changes to deal with in the past 3 months it's bound to affect anyone. Please talk to someone, if you don't it'll just get worse. Xx

  • Hi Andy,

    That’s an awful lot to contend with all at once, so it must feel like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders at the moment.

    One of the best thing you can do at the moment is talk to as many people you feel comfortable talking with, those that just say pull yourself together, steer away from until you can handle them.

    I know it’s no good saying don’t worry about money and jobs at the moment, because of course you are going to do that, I got redundancy a few years back and ended up in hospital as I just couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, and yet here I am 7 years later with a good well paid job (it took 6 months in the bad recession until it got better though), yet I still get days where I hate it :-) I am just learning not to expect too much from myself when everything is supposed to be good!

    Jobs do come and go and what I am trying to say is when the time is right you are most likely going to get a better one than what you had before. First and foremost you need to take care of yourself, then you will be able to give the support needed to your new family.

    GP and counseling are good, but so are many many other things, relaxation techniques, mindfulness of trying to accept your situation without anger or sadness, none of this is easy, and everything is done very slowly over and over.

    Andy, you are not alone with these kind of feelings, sometimes life takes us to very dark places, but there is always a light at the end of each tunnel and with small steps you well get there.

    Lots of Hugs to you.

    Moni xxxx

  • I'm with your girlfriend here. A lot has happened for you lately - it is certainly a lot to take on board and anyone would struggle to cope with all this.

    I would recommend seeing your doctor. He may not even put you on meds, he may give you self-help techniques or website to look at.

    I think it's great you have come onto this website to seek help. It's a first step. Don't be scared to talk about things. Otherwise, how will anything get better? You also have a beautiful little girl to think of and I'm sure she wants her dad to be happy. So it may be a good idea to get an app with your doctor. Maybe you could speak to your girlfriend about things first? She sounds supportive xx

  • Hi Andy,

    Welcome and nice too hear from you. Congratulations on the birth of your little girl.

    The good point is that you recognise your feelings and symptoms. You have been through a lot and it is normal to be feeling sad and anxious. There is a lot of stress in the situation you find yourself in and the experiences you are going through, loss, change, pressure, worry etc. I'm not surprised you aren't sleeping. However, I would urge you to go and see your GP. In my experience ignoring these warnings signals could lead to it being worse further down the line and they may not go away on their own. Your GP will just talk to you. They see these type of symptoms every day. You don't have to take medication, it may be that sleeping tablets help for a week or two to get you back into a routine. The GP may suggest a referral for some individual or group counselling or as suggested techniques for relaxing. My depression and anxiety was diagnosed earlier this year after various issues, with work, money, house moving, family, stress etc. I ignored feeling unhappy/isolated for a year or so before that. I feel it is a reaction to a stressful situation where lots of elements just overwhelm you. It is scary going to the GP but you don't want to feel like this do you?

    Sarah

  • You must be going through a very hard time and I am sorry for your losses. I suggest you find something that can occupy your mind, maybe some hobby or some sports both to release your stress and build yourself up. I know how it feels like to not want to do anything and just wish to disappear. Best of luck x

    Hannah

  • You must be going through a very hard time and I am sorry for your losses. I suggest you find something that can occupy your mind, maybe some hobby or some sports both to release your stress and build yourself up. I know how it feels like to not want to do anything and just wish to disappear. Best of luck x

    Hannah

  • Hi everyone

    Thank you for you kind comments and support . I will call the docs today to try get an appointment. I fell asleep at about 8 this morning gt up at one so sleeps getting there would prefer a pattern but any sleeps good at the min. Got Ma bro coming to see me today so that should keep My mind off everything. Al let you all know what doc says when I go thank you all again.

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