Feeling very low

Just found this site and have been reading your posts... It's comforting to know I'm not alone, I have really messed up.... Feeling very low at the moment I'm not being treated for depression but I need to get to the doctors and see what they can offer me to help ... I always do the same things I control my drinking get a job and then cannot cope with the pressure and go on a drinking bender ... That's happened last 2 weekends and I'm 2 bad to go to work , unfortunately I have just lost my job this morning

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  • Hello and welcome!

    I'm really sorry that you've lost your job, but you are able to identify the root of the problem, and that's a huge step in the right direction.

    Alcohol is a drug and it's also a depressant. You're in a vicious circle and you need to address your drinking and the reasons why you binge drink, before you can hope for job certainty.

    Loads and loads of people drink, so you're not alone with some dark, seedy problem. Your doctor will be able to point you in the direction of organisations that can support you with your alcohol dependency.

    Small steps are what are needed, and you'll get there.

    Lucy x

  • Thanks Lucy they are kind words and make total since .... I defo have tricker points and I feel so bad as my mum is so upset with me

  • There will always be people who are upset. Alcohol dependency is complicated and it affects not only the drinker but the people close to them. Your mum is upset because she probably feels helpless and perhaps doesn't understand that you aren't able to just stop. Can you talk to her about how you are feeling? X

  • Yes I'm very close with her and will have a talk with her later today I'm feeling so rough from all the drinking at the moment got up this morning and was sick were I have gone way over the top on the drink

  • It sounds like you're being very honest with yourself, which is not at all easy to do. Unfortunately it takes reaching an all time low for you to see that it's time to start climbing out x

  • Hi my friend Lucy , I'm sitting on balcony in morning sun. It's nice and I'm

    Just in the moment. Talk to you later.

    Hannah x

  • I'd like that! Enjoy the sun, it's cloudy here x

  • Hi Melanie. Sorry to hear your In a bad place. You have taken the first step

    In Admitting Alcohol is a problem in your life. Losing your job is hard but it

    Will be the story of your life if you don't get help.

    Please go online and see what help us available for you Alcoholics Anonomyous

    Helps a lot of people and you see how other people cope. It's for everyone, but it's

    Worth giving it a try.

    Melanie I had an Alcoholic in my life and it's a horrendous progressive illness.

    Get help now please and you can start to build your life again. I feel your

    Quite young , so go for it , no need to feel ashamed or guilty , it's an illness .

    Hannah

  • Thanks Hannah your totally right I just need to make that step .... It's a hard one have tried to get help in the past and been told I'm not an alcoholic ... They just don't seem to get it I can go a few weeks with not drinking ... But then I suddenly have an outburst that it's odium loads of damage ... I think I need to go back to my therapy I was having last year hypnotherapy it was really good .... That's my problem now I'm not sure if I should get tablets or not

  • Hi Melanie I'm not sure who told you that you were not an Alcoholic. That's ridiculous . The World Health Deficnition of an Alcoholic is when drinking interferes with your home life, your job etc.

    So go to a proper place that can help you, I would not have thought Hynotherapy would be great.

    You need help from an Alcohol Programme and they will put you

    On the right path.

    Check online fir help in your area. You could start with A. A. Meetings look them up online. My friend who is sober now finds them a good support.

    It's really up to you Melanie. There is lots of help. So get it and

    Don't join the silly club.

    Hugs

    Hannah x

  • Yes I know it's a joke really that they said that to me, that was the nhs support group they were really nice but they are not really interested if your not drinking everyday they see it as I'm in control but I'm no way in control for long periods of time. Thanks for your message I will look into A A after all it cannot make it any worse than it's got xx

  • Hannah's definition is spot on. Alcoholism can take many different guises. Some people need to drink every minute they're awake, and that's the typical image we have of someone who is alcoholic dependent - the guy on the bench with his bottle of cider.

    Actually there are people who can go for substantial amounts of time without a drink, but that need to go back to it is real and doesn't go away.

  • Hello

    You need support for your drinking so I would advise you to back to your GP who will arrange some form of treatments and local Societies that will most probably be there too help as well. AA work on a buddy system where people together help each other..

    Writing above I understand you drink at weekends,so you may be a problem drinker. This is generally treated the same way as a buddy system, it is very important you get help now as drinking heavy over say a weekend can cause breakdowns in your internal organs. Generally if you are a weekend drinker it could be made worse by the company you keep, if they drink heavy you will follow and this can further problems with your health. Drink can also cause changes to the brain and this will effect memory and concentration.

    See the GP, tell HIM/HER that you have lost your job and need help a way forward will be advised

    BOB

  • Thanks bob have emailed AA so now I have all the details for my local places to go ... Just need to book doctors now and go lol ... I will do it although the thought of AA is quite scary ... But I guess not as scary as the amount I drunk over the weekend! Your right really I am able to recognise my problems I have stop drink totally once before for 3 months and I was a completely different person it's just hard staying off have never wanted to completely stop and maybe that's the problem deep down I have always thought I would be able to co

  • Cope. But I clearly cannot it's such a shAme about my job I finally got a job I really wanted and have only been there 3 weeks I just could hold it together ... Not sure why this happens with me hopefully AA will help me understand

  • Cope. But I clearly cannot it's such a shAme about my job I finally got a job I really wanted and have only been there 3 weeks I just could hold it together ... Not sure why this happens with me hopefully AA will help me understand

  • Hello Mel

    Today I was with our Practice Health Coach and we were discussing drink and associated other health problems. We all have our weaknesses and the main thing is that you act upon it. You are half way better when you know you have that problem and understand and act on the pathway you need to take. My problem is weight as I am a RA sufferer and I am unable to exercise in the way healthy people do. When push comes to shove we all including me has to take control of our own faults, no matter what the situation is all belongs to us to put right. So I understand fully the main problem you have although like you they do not find an easy way out and all seems to be very, very hard and we sit and bite our lip when the cure is explained to us.

    Try not to be to hard on yourself, do what needs to be done and you will find the cure that little bit more palatable.

    Good Luck

    BOB

  • Hello bob,

    Thank you for your kind words and sorry to know you have RA that must be very hard to live with. Can it be treated? Sorry but I don't know much about that but sounds very hard to cope with. I guess we all walk a hard path of trying to cope with things. I had some amazing news this morning which was totally unexpected but my boss called me and asked me to go back to work he explained that him and the director was very pleased that I had been open about what the problem was the last few weeks and he explained that they valued the short time I had worked there and they will offer me a roll in contract to see how it goes! I really have been given another chance to change and just say no to my demonds I am feeling very blessed today and my mum is now more settled all I have to do now is not touch a drink !!

    So can you swim? Or is that something not suitable aswell? Sorry again I'm not really aware of what you can and cannot do but it would be nice to talk to you xx

  • Hi Melanie, congrats with the job, that's fantastic news!!!

    how lovely that things have brightened so quickly and now with you start in finding help with the problem you will go from strengh to strengh.

    All the best honey and take good care of yourself xxx

  • Thank you

  • Hi Melanie

    You know there was a lovely singer in the 60 / 70 called Melanie, look up 'brand new key'

    Don't do the alcohol Melanie come on you're a smart gal.

    I was like you maybe younger? A teenager no real work responsibilities oooh and could I drink. I remember the warm feeling of timing out, feeling nothing, getting rid of that awful feeling of sadness, suicidal thoughts, just for a few hours. I even used to enjoy that feeling you got laying on your bed when the room swirls round. I was a happy drunk you know the singing kind, the one who tells you " I love you" like I really meant it with my dying breath...what a pain :-)

    Then one day I realised I was only on one road and I just stopped, never went into an offy, never looked at drink, I stopped for a year and gradually went back to the odd glass of beer / brandy. I dont drink now cos Im on this gawd aweful gulten free diet, but ooooh once every 2 months I used to enjoy a bottle or Dorset's finest Badger its a real ale :-)

    I think you are like I was, I think you can give this up anytime you choose and if you aren't an alcoholic then thats something to be proud of.

    Bottom line alcoholics are fools, they know what they are doing and I think there comes a time when you can choose to become a true drinker and die of drink, or have it run your life, or there is a small window of opportunity when you can simply stop.

    What you need to consider is the lasting damage if you become a full time drinker, sometimes that damage cannot be reversed and do you really want to be telling the love of your life in the future , you need dialasis 2/3 a week until someone can donate you a kidney so no the honeymoon in Hawaii is out of the question.

    Hannah's right, get help, have someone support you through this, but know that you are smarter than this.

    Merely look around at those alcoholics you see, do you really want to join their brigade, do you want to be / live like they do (they are tooo far gone, you aren't, you have a big chance, grab it) LOVE YOURSELF you are worth it, say...THIS ISNT GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME!

    I don't even have to tell you this stuff you know all this, you're a smart resourceful woman. If you're keen to die, die jumping out of an airplane holding a waterhose to save a child from a burning building in Africa, dont give your life to drink thats sooo 1970s.

    You can do this Melanie it takes guts to own up to f*cking up, I do it ALLLL the time, you are not alone and the people here will support you in your right to be.....THE ONE THE ONLY WONDERFUL MELANIE.

    Show us all, show everyone, but most of all show yourself, drink is so lame, now food.....oh no just kidding, Im on that trip, don't start that!

    Try and keep it light, be kind yourself, you can kick this and boy when you do will you feel good. I doubt you will need to give up drink for life, just long enough to feel it isn't controlling you and that you drink for the pleasure of the taste not the hit.

    Good Luck and keep talking! :-) BIG HUG ...really xxx What a smart gal, you can do this.

  • I think my mum and dad name me after the singer

  • Actually I have a gluten free diet apart from when I drink then it goes out the window! When I stopped drinking for 3 months I did the juicer diet and only ate fish and chicken I did feel amazing but unfortunately when I come of the juicer and started to eat normal food I realised very fast that I had got a gluten issue ... How do you find your diet with no wheat ? It's hard work sometimes I found if I'm out and want to grab something to eat lol ...,, xxx

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