Don't know how to cope

Hi my dad passed away 14 weeks ago he was 53 and died suddenly we later found out he had lung cancer I have been having anxiety for 2 years prior thinking my dad was going to die even though he was relativly heathy id work myself into a state sometimes id even hold on to go to the toilet just so I didn't have to go downstairs I now am struggling to cope I have anxiety attacks about 10 times a day some get to the point I can't swallow or breathe can someone help me please

7 Replies

  • Any death is an horrendous strain, a sudden one even more so. Have you talked to your GP about these attacks? He might be able to help you with some coping strategies or refer you for bereavement counselling? X

  • I was told 3 years ago I have post traumatic stress disorder I had counseling but it didn't help me not sure what the next step would be

  • Hi Cliff

    Was it the therapy or the therapist you didn't get on with? Either way perhaps a different therapist or different type of therapy could help?

  • Counselling is only effective if it happens at the time that you're ready for it. You can ask your GP to refer you again, based on recent events. You might be more receptive this time x

  • I had couselling for both my father and my brother suicide i found it did nothing for me I suffer from mood swings which killed my marriage my wife found my horrendous to live with .

    Sorry for your loss it's awful and I know how your feeling

  • I think it was abit of both and I know the mood swings quite well iv been quite snappy with my husband just feel stuck in a rut and not sure what to do

  • CBT therapy may help with your anxiety and should at least give you more feelings of control when they happen. I am wondering why the idea of losing your father made you so anxious - sad yes, but why anxious? You do not mention your mother. Also I wonder whether you had experiences of loss of separation or loss in your childhood and if so whether your father's loss reminds you of those times when you would have been dependant upon the person you were separated from or lost. x

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