My mother is driving me nuts !!!!

[Llama215]

I'm a 17 year old girl and I'm sooo sick and tired of my mom! We lost my dad October 3rd to cancer and we've all had it rough . Her anger was because he was gone. She would always yell at me about irrelevant stuff for no reason and it was because he was gone . Now she's always yelling at me saying "you're are almost an adult act like one" blah blah . She's soo hard on me and she doesn't realize how much it hurts. She keeps me in and confined and I just want to rebel! I've considered drinking and smoking sooo many times cuz she stresses me out soooo much . Idk I believe she's putting alot on me. I just can't take it anymore ...

[Suzie40]

Have you talked to her about this? X

[Llama215 in reply to Suzie40]

I ask her to stop yelling but it doesn't work

[teajay]

I wanted my mom to go to greif counseling with me...but she wasn't for it. We did have one session with a therapist together and that got us talking about our feelings.

Sorry you are having to go through this...

Tamra

[gb1943yu]

I can fully empathise with you, I nursed my father with the intimate side of his care while he died of motor neurone disease, my mother took it out on me after he went both verbally and physically kicking me and hitting me and making my face haemorrhage after numerous difficult dental extractions, I had trigeminal neuralgia they did not know .how to treat at the time in 1982. Do you have a kind doctor or church contact you can go and talk to, a youth or scout leader who will confidentially allow you to off load. Even the organisation called Cruse, try googleing bereavement counselling organisations in your area, I believe there is an organisation specifically for children and young adults in your situation. Our Worthing and Shoreham Cruse has folded but a group of Methodists and Anglicans are talking and acting on getting a replacement group going apparently and our minister has now taken the point about making facilities available for young ex carers and bereaved siblings. So you have been creative here take courage and pride in that its a positive thing, where you do seem to be engulfed in negativity at the moment. It takes a long time for both of you to get over and the first year is the worst withal the anniversaries. Perhaps if you can not afford them a walk in the country or ride if you have a bike will get y6ou out, a break and some fresh air to clear the cobwebs in your mind and while you are out try to find a posy of wild flowers and leave with a few pretty twigs. If you cant do that get some paints and paint her a picture can be anything even doodles or modern art as long as its free thinking and colourful. You might find yourself expressing yourself and releasing things and eventually enjoying it.

All my love

Gill

If you want to carry this on privately I am only too 3willing to help.

..

[Llama215 in reply to gb1943yu]

I have a therapist I talk to about it and it helps sometimes

[Photogeek]

Hi there, its hard being a teenager, without the added strain of grief, and your Mom not being kind to you. You are very tuned in to her feelings, but I really think you need to talk to someone about this, would there be any close family you could talk to? or a Rector from your Church? or a GP. She probaly does not realise that she is grieving and stressed, so its making her cranky with you. Try too and get time away from your Mom, and encourage her to go out and meet her friends and stuff.

Please dont do any self destructive stuff, its not worth it as you will end up with more problems. I totally understand your frustration, and I think you are very mature to bring this up. Sending you a big warm hug too. x

Hannah

[Llama215 in reply to Photogeek]

Thanks for the hug I need it lol