does anybody else get depressed despite their life being relatively good?

[spudo]

my life is pretty good i'd say; a girlfriend, a loving family, financial stability (although i'm skint at the moment as i can't save money) and good academic potential (starting medicine at uni in september). why then do I suffer from anxiety/depression even though everything's ok?

[Gambit62]

Definitely ... think that is the most depressing thing

Some of it may be genetic - pretty sure my father got really depressed as well because of the way he would talk with me when he knew I was depressed. And pretty sure that was really what killed him in the end - lost the will to go on, so no fight against other things.

wish I had a more hopeful answer

good luck with the degree. Go out there and find us all a cure ... but no pressure

[Lois1959]

Yes you can be depressed when things are ok. Because it is an illness; an imbalance of seratonin in the brain. No-one would think to question any other medical condition...if you broke you arm, got a virus you would still get either for example when life was on an even keel and you wouldn't ask why.

I agree with Gambit62 go out an at least kick ass when you undertake your degree; seems to be the one area where the medical prosession aren't trained to try and understand it or simply choose not to!!

Good Luck with your studies.

[Golfer15]

Definately yes. I have a loving family, nice house, good job and financial stability and yet I feel depressed. I have felt like this for years. I have had treatment and on medication and I am learning to live with it but it is not easy.

Take it one day at a time. Ive had a good day today as I started the day with a visit to the gym. I went shopping this afternoon with my wife for some new shoes for her. I knew this would be difficult but it was ok as she found some. I felt ok which could be because I went to the gym earlier. Im now alone listening to music. You have to find your own coping strategies.

Good luck spudo. Keep in touch.

[gardengnome]

Starting uni, the prospect of leaving home, having to be a grown up, being largely responsible for yourself, juggling commitments with maintaining a good relationship with a girlfriend, the question of how to juggle student loans, doing well to get a job,..... Perhaps you have a few small reasons for anxiety...... Only you know exactly how much the anxiety/depression is affecting you and whether you need any extra help like counselling or meds. If it's low level stuff them consciously keeping on top of the stuff you can control like course work and using self help systems like c.b.t. books might be enough.

With luck when you finally get into the uni term you may find you can cope, if not do not let yourself spiral downwards, start seeking support. One friend has had to wait several months on a waiting list before actually getting to see a uni counsellor. And don't forget friends and family for that extra boost on tough days, if you don't tell them how you feel they can't help.

[Suzie40]

What makes a life relatively good? I have a degree, a good job, my own house and two beautiful children. But I don't consider my life to be good. Good woud be having parents who are well and a kind and loving husband to come home to each night. My sister can't hold down a job and lives off benefits and handouts. She thinks my life is relatively good. A guy I know sleeps rough. He probably thnks my sister's life is relatively good. Your standard of living is irrelevant. If you're predisposed to being depressed, it'll engulf you regardless.

[Gambit62]

Occurred to me later that,

a) leaving aside the actual anxiety and depression there are a lot of physical illnesses - anaemia, B12 deficiency, thyroid problems - that have anxiety and depression as symptoms. It may be worth seeing doctor to check that there isn't anything else going on

b) guilt is one of depression&anxiety's minions. (Saw Despicable Me2 on Friday so now have images of guilt as a toothy furry purple creature holding a fart gun!). As Susie says - it is all relative. Just tell him to shut up - or shoot him with the jelly gun (you will have to go and see the film to understand that)

[Hidden]

Yes, yes, yes. I think many people feel guilty about being depressed precisely because we have everything that SHOULD make us happy and yet we are still unhappy. I feel guilt every day and yet still drop into a distressed depressed state despite knowing it's unfair to the people I turn to for support, despite knowing my husband loves me and that I am also extremely fond of him and perhaps love him too, despite having a lovely house and garden and knowing I am more fortunate than other people, despite.... Does that sound familiar? We are all struggling with feelings that we know are often not rational and yet we still go on struggling, that is the nature of depression and why it is so debilitating. Often what we are depressed about is quite subtle and has little to do with what we HAVE and more to do with what we didn't have when we needed it at some time in our lives. I know that for me, I needed support and recognition when I was a child but didn't feel loved and so continue not to feel loved even though I know I am. That's the cause of my depression. Often it is something as simple as that. Experiences in the past, as well as genetics, alter our biochemistry and make it likely we may become depressed at a later stage of life and more difficult for us to overcome the feelings if we do become depressed. It's a cruel life sometimes...

I do envy you starting at med school but I know that even that doesn't necessarily make someone happy. The one positive thing is that you may earn well from the work and having money makes it easier to cope with other difficulties in life - don't let anyone say money doesn't matter because in reality it matters very much! Hopefully you will also gain some satisfaction and enjoyment from helping other people within your work, but in terms of helping yourself with the depression why not ask when you start at Uni to see the student counsellor? Talking things through may begin to help, not just with the stress of starting med school but also with the feelings you are bringing with you. The important thing is not to try to cope alone because it WILL be stressful and you will need emotional resources - coping with depression is difficult but coping at the same time as starting Uni and at the same time as starting a demanding med degree will put demands upon you emotionally so seek the support you need so that you cope well and don't reinforce the depression. You are clearly very able, lucky you, so use your brain to seek help for yourself as well as for other people!

Suexxx