Feel like ending it all today

My problems are spiralling out of control. I am in debt up to my eyeballs. I don't earn enough money to cover my bills. Ive cut down as much as I can. Im literally on the verge of loosing my house. The housing has told me that they're preparing court papers today. I feel like giving my parents my daughter to look after cause I can't cope anymore.

I can't deal with the fact im a failure to her. She deserves so much better.

I feel like just ending it all and being done with it

9 Replies

  • Hi Soozy.

    That all sounds incredibly difficult, and naturally very stressful. Well done on posting here though. I know how bleak things must seem right now.

    Firstly, can I ask do you have any plans do end your own life?

    Have you spoken to anyone about the debt problems e.g. Citizen's Advice? If you don't earn enough to cover the bills, there is help that can be provided e.g. debt management plans.

    Please hang in there.

    Who do you have in your life at the moment who can help with this? Do your family know how bad things are?


  • Hi Soozy

    I don't know if you have taken debt advice before or not, but there are certain debts which are priority, like rent, mortgage,council tax, gas, electric and others which are not, such as credit agreements, catalogue payments. If you have any debts which are not classed as priority you can offer to pay only what you can afford to pay - (and you are the person who decides what that amount is). After my divorce I had home improvements to pay for such as new gas boiler, new windows - and the payments were crippling me. I offered to pay a very small sum each month (which I could afford) and showed them my income and expenditure sheet to prove it. More often than not they will accept what you offer because they know that if they take you to Court (and that costs them money) that the court will only make you pay what you can afford anyway. They may transfer the debt to a debt collection agency, but again they can only accept what you say you can afford. You may get a bad credit rating from doing this - which will stay with you for 5 years and make it difficult to get credit - but I paid off my debts this way, and because its more than 5 years ago now - my credit rating is now good. If you haven't already done so please get in touch with a debt advice centre who will help you by providing the wording for the letter(s) you need to send and help with writing an income and expenditure sheet. The citizens advice bureau can help you and their services are free. Did you know that if you only watch DVDs on your telly - you do not need a TV licence. (That's a saving). Hang on in there - there is light at the end of the tunnel. If I can make it - so can you.

  • Soozy, I am so sorry you're having such a rough time.

    I had an advocate to help me.

    I've looked it up and found a link :-



    this should take you to a link for

    Dundee Independent Advocacy Support (DIAS)

    Location Map 6a Meadow Mill

    West Henderson's Wynd


    DD1 5BY

    Phone Number: 01382 205 515

    Fax Number: 01382 205 515


    Email: office@diasdundee.org

    Website: diasdundee.org/

    please call them asap.

    please come back on here and talk to us.



  • Thanks for the replies. I feel so lost. I have rent arrers and because ive had to cut my working hours down I am now struggling so much. Im honestly contemplating giving up work altogether and going on ESA. Financially it makes sense for now. But I don't know. Its hard to go from working to not working but right now im in no fit state to be working.

    Sandra my mum is an advocate for DIAS would you believe! But i had no idea that they could support me in times like this. Will keep it in mind.

    My rent arrears is out of control. Its at the court stage and im on the verge of loosing my house. I have been trying to pay what I can. And im only entitled to. £8 a week housing benefit :(

  • I urge you to get help with money advice, the councils have money advice officers and there's also CAB. Have you considered bankruptcy or a trust deed where you pay what you can afford for one year and then the remainder is written off. You aren't allowed any credit for 5 years but it would take so much pressure off your shoulders. As your income has dropped is there any other benefit entitlements? Please keep in touch xx

  • Hi believe it or not I actually work for tax credits so quite good knowledge of benefits system.JJust a shame I don't qualify for more help.

    Still considering leaving and going on esa or leaving to get a basic 16 hour a week job and get more help. Im one of the people that are stuck in the middle. I want to work but cant work full time but don't qualify for enough help :(

  • I do feel for you soozy its a very difficult situation isn't it. But you are not alone there are lots of people with debt and in your situation. I agree that you need to seek debt management advice. The government offer free help as does the CAB. Bear in mind though that there are many scam companies out there who will try and charge you!

    I don't know if its much consolation for you but depending on the age of your child the local council have a duty to rehouse you. It might only be in b and b for a while but you won't be living on the streets at least. I presume you do live in the UK?

    Good luck with it all love. Let us know how you get on.

    Bev xx

  • Feel for you and hope you can get the support and help you need. Have a feeling that it is close to you if you can reach out and ask.

    Also I recommend you talk to one of the debt charities who will definitely be able to help you get a debt management plan in place. I did mine with Christians against Poverty (CAP) who were amazing.


    Or you can try Stepchange or Payplan. Try this forum for advice and ideas plus lots of useful links.


    You will get through this.

    Take care

  • As you work for tax credits could you request a reduction in your hours to 16 that you mentioned? Take care and keep in touch.

    B xx

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