I'm new here....: Hey there I’m new here and... - Above & Beyond

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I'm new here....

rize profile image
rize
6 Replies

Hey there I’m new here and I’m kinda feeling nervous to talk about some personal stuff or about myself here. It’s my first time, I’m kind of confused, since I don’t really have a best friend, so I thought talking about my thoughts and feelings here. Recently I’ve been feeling so down but no one could make me feel better or cheer me up, I don’t really understand the reason, I’m always here for my friends, always supporting them, supporting their decisions, giving them strength to get up, to continue, to achieve things, etc. I was always hiding my sadness, anxiety, stress, painful memories and trauma, with a smile, always pretending that I’m alright that nothing wrongs. But then, just yesterday I decided to let my mask down with some friends with whom I’m closed to, some of them whom I always cheered up, being always here for them, but it was just like they didn’t know what to reply, some of them ignore my state, by completely changing the subject of the discussion, others just told me to try to feel better, they just told me that they don’t really like the actual part of me that is feeling down, they want me to be like usual, the “me” that everyone knows. I felt like they wanted to ignore, or not accept the fact that I can have some moments where I not feeling so joyful like I’m pretending every day, and no one among them asked me the reason why I’m feeling down. So I’m a bit confused, I don’t really know how to feel toward this. I’m still doubting about real friendship, that’s why I even didn’t precise the reason why I’m feeling so down, all what I’ve said was “I’m feeling down, I’m not in a mood to do this or that”, and the replays that I had was unexpected... Is it because I was expecting a little bit too much? I don't really understand…or I'm I overthinking?

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rize profile image
rize
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6 Replies

Hello rize and welcome to our supportive Community.

I am sorry to hear about the difficulties you are having.

When friends you have listened to, encouraged and supported do not do the same for you you can experience a range of feelings; feeling let down, feeling not listened to, disappointment, anger, resentment.

Asking for any kind of help involves risk. Never give up asking for help Rize, sometimes it is a good idea to look in a different place. Do you feel able to talk to one of your friends away from the group? Maybe they will act differently towards you. Can you talk to your parents or any brothers and sisters. I would like to think that your parents could help you if they knew what was troubling you.

Is there perhaps a school Counsellor that you could arrange to see?

Let me know how you get on Rize. If you let me know your age and give me a little more information I may be able to help you more. In the meantime we are always here to support, do take care,

Lottie

rize profile image
rize in reply to

Yeah I have tried talking to others friends but still nothing changed, they think that I'm over thinking, so it's kind of the same. I don't want to concern my parents about this kind of feelings, besides I have tried once and they just told me that it's something that happens, that I shouldn't overthink... I'm the elder and I'm not that close to my brother...

As for my age, I'm 19 and in second year college....

And thank you for the support, maybe I just should move on and pretend that nothing happened?

in reply to rize

Rize, thank you for getting back to me. I completely understand you not wanting to concern your parents.

In your post you described feelings of sadness, anxiety, painful memories, stress and trauma contributed to your low mood. It is really difficult feeling unsupported.

Rize, if you feel you would like to explore your feelings further then I suggest you speak to a college counsellor or ask your Doctor to refer you for tallking therapy. There is another website called 7cupsoftea which you may also find useful.

Please stay in touch, we are always here to support you.

Lottie

chloe40 profile image
chloe40

Hi rize

Sorry to read of you problems. Can you let me know how old you are and I may be able to redirect you to a more suitable Forum.

Chloe

rize profile image
rize in reply to chloe40

I'm 19, but I think it's going to be alright, I won't need another forum... I'm not use to talk about my feelings this way, so I'm not feeling at ease, it's something new to me so I don't really know how to act or react...

chloe40 profile image
chloe40 in reply to rize

Don't worry about not feeling at ease rize I just wanted to be sure you were given the right support that all :-)

You're welcome here anytime and remember, we were all new once!

Chloe

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