I just wanted to bring up something I learnt 6 years ago when I was going through hell with T.
We can think of our brains as having a logical part and an emotional part. Both are very important so I’m not saying one is more important than the other.
One of the people who counselled me back then explained this to me and said that we can use the logical part of the brain to calm down and control the emotional part.
The emotional part (being very ancient) struggles to deal with the stresses of modern life. It also struggles to deal with things like T. In fact the largest part of the suffering with T is the emotional response. Anger, frustration, doom, tears...
When you feel locked into your T and your emotions are going haywire try saying to yourself, “What good can possibly come out of allowing myself to get upset about this?”. “What good can possibly come out of listening to it’?”. The anxiety also usually causes the T to worsen, so try to practice using your will power to prevent your emotions latching onto it. Distraction is a good way to help take your focus off it.
There is some logic behind this technique too. So long as the brain sees something (like T) as a threat, it will always respond to it as a threat. T is just a sound and won’t kill us, however I believe that for some reason, some people (like it did for me) the sound is perceived as a major annoyance in the same way some people can’t stand noisy neighbours (that’s why I now live on a boat...lol).
Anyway, eventually the brain begins to stop seeing the T as a threat and turns down the perception of it. A very similar thing happens with pain. Pain is a very important warning system but once the brain realises the cause is not reversible, like in old age, it turns the volume of the pain down. Again if we stay focussed on the pain. the brain struggles to let it go.
I’m pretty sure those of us who have obsessive tendencies (like me) struggle a lot more with T than others for this reason. It’s harder for us to take our focus off the T. Those who tend to be perfectionists may also struggle more. I used to throw away records if they had the tiniest scratch on them! So perhaps understanding this mechanism and learning to use our logical part of the brain, will help some like it did for me.
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It’s interesting that ‘acceptance’ seems to work for some and others (like me) find fighting the negative emotions works.
I think either way, the brain rewires itself to stop seeing the T as a threat once we stop
reacting emotionally to it. It’s like dealing with an annoying friend. You can ignore them or just accept who they are and learn to tolerate them.
I think it’s the rewiring bit newbies struggle with. It’s very difficult to believe that the brain can lean to filter the T out. However, it can! In the same way wearing glasses can be an annoyance to start with, but then after a while you no longer realise they are there. (I know maybe not a great analogy)
As I have an interest in the subject, I have spoken to many people about tinnitus. Many who have/had it but never sought medical attention. The overriding comment from them is usually something like...“I don’t notice it unless someone reminds me of it”.
This is why I think too much public awareness might be a bad idea. Just being there for people like the BTA is a good thing though. There are a lot of scammers out there.
I think that's a good explanation Steve. Our limbic system (fight or flight) being so closely linked to our hearing keeps us safe/alive but it does need teaching that not all unpleasant noises - tinnitus, neighbours, your partner snoring - are a threat.
This is only a wild guess but I suspect the reason why tinnitus is instantly seen by the brain as a threat is because it may be a natural response to stress. As I’ve said before, it’s interesting how a high pitched whistle has been used by film/drama makers to add a fear element to the scene. Most people experience temporary tinnitus after being subjected to a loud sound or undergo a very stressful event.
Pain is also another natural response to stress. Physical and mental pain. Most of us take pain killers to deal with physical pain and maybe anti-depressants for mental pain, but they rarely cure the root cause.
When some say tinnitus is your friend, they may well be right. Modern life is very false and full of stress which we grow up to believe is normal. Who knows, it might be telling us something.
As regards snoring, yes it can be a useful natural masker. Sadly for Chris it’s the other way round. She has bought a load of ear plugs now. I think she’s planning to solve the problem by stuffing them down my throat!
Youre stressed! I know what i’ll do i’ll create a high pitched shriek in your head 24/7 that will up that stress to unbearable levels and push you over the edge. Cheers body!
I guess it’s just natural selection. We failed at the game of ‘life’ and T is just a big flashing ‘game over’. If we’re lucky like some we get to reset the game, start over. If not, we end up here ranting, raving and wishing we had used our lives more wisely.
Do you know, every one of your posts are full of negativity (maybe a clue there!).
If you really believe the stuff you come out with then how on earth do you think you will snap out of this? How can others help you if you don’t want to help yourself?
Have you booked an appointment with a counsellier yet? Have you tried taking a positive step at all yet?
You don’t seem willing to take on board any help you have been given here so far, so what are you trying to gain out of this?
Sadly Steve I don’t think I’m going to ‘snap’ out of this. As a reminder I’ve spent nearly 15 grand and counting on ‘treatments’. It’s money I worked bloody hard to earn and would love to have spent on something normal people spend their money on but no, I’m everyday funneling more and more on CBT, NLP, EFT, Rtms, insanely expensive sound therapies like Levo which is basically a 4 grand iPod (luckily they throw in some therapy) chiropractic, acupuncture, fasting retreats and on and on. I even looked in to a bloody exorcism at my lowest point mentally and spiritually. I basically have an encyclopaedic knowledge and experience of tinnitus therapy and even though I worn several months trying to stay resilient I do feel ground down that my life is just a merry go round of false hope.
I concede the one treatment I haven’t tried is happiness- purely because I cannot grasp it anywhere. I think I was one of those people that relied on big serotonin rewards in life and now those are all gone.
In many ways you are correct in what you say about the logic and emotional parts of our brain. In a similar way my younger brother, who has peripheral neuropathy pains in his feet, actually talks openly to the pains in his feet and tells them to politely go away. Surprisingly, most often the pains do ease to a level that he can walk without pain, although they do return and he has to repeat the messages all over again. It is certainly worth a try to do this with our tinnitus noises. What have we got to lose?
I can understand this. I’ve had arthritis in both of my feet since my 20s. I got so annoyed with it that I sought surgery. However, the thought of surgery and having pins put in my toes persuaded me to battle on with it.
I carried on playing football, badminton and doing long walks, all the things I loved doing. Over time I realised that I rarely noticed the pain anymore. Ok, it aches a bit after a long walk but soon fades off after resting them.
If pain (and maybe even tinnitus) is just part of our warning system, it would make sense that if the body can’t repair itself, it winds down the warning signal. What would be the point in it torturing us until we die?
One other thought about this, in the same way some people self harm when they are going through stress and anxiety. is it possible that some people hang onto tinnitus as a way of self harming? I asked myself this many years ago. In fact, did I bring it on myself?
As I say. the brain is wonderful but very complex. Life these days is also very complex and to be honest I think everyone should try counselling...even if it is just chatting to your mate in the pub!
For me there is nothing more comforting than a chat with a mate or stranger over a pint in a pub. That is where all the wrongs in the world are put to right. Lang may your lum reek asw21.
Can I agree with you here Steve. I was struggling with pain and depression pre T. I was leading a somewhat reclusive life and not discussing my mounting problems with anyone. It was the worst year of my life. The night before I got T i actually said to my mother of all people, ‘sometimes I wish I was dead.’ And then WHAM! Screaming 3am tinnitus. This stupid statement in a moment of self pity combined with raging T, insomnia delirium and a bad reaction to Zopiclone and hypnotism of all things led to my having a total psychotic breakdown which sent my T in to the stratosphere and nearly killed me......Be very careful what you wish for has never been so apt.
Unfortunately, and I do understand this, most people don’t respond well to having stuff rammed down their throats. Most of the big lessons in life we need to/want to learn for ourselves.
I’ll try to answer the question in the PM you sent me asking how I managed not to focus on the T when reading or watching TV.
Well in the early stages as you say , the T is just...there. However after 4 months you may have found there were short periods you didn’t actually notice it. This is because when our brain is distracted it doesn’t notice the T. You may have even tried listening for it to see if it has gone, then panicked again because you can hear it again.
Firstly I learnt not to be tempted to listen for it when I hadn’t noticed it. Secondly, I learnt not to allow my emotions to latch onto it when I did notice it.
Over time, the ‘quiet’ spells got longer and longer as I gained confidence in my brains ability to push the T out of my conciousness. The brain eventually rewires itself so it doesn’t perceive the T as a threat anymore. I actually stopped hearing it unless I chose to, even then it takes a few seconds to hear it now.
Watching TV and reading books are good ways to distract your attention from the T. but you have to choose not to give the T attention.
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