struggling to get baby to nap/sleep - Pregnancy and Par...

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struggling to get baby to nap/sleep

Gardener11 profile image
11 Replies

hi my baby is 5 months at the end of the week. He has never really napped well since birth other than the initial 2 weeks. His naps are usually all taken on me after a feed (breastfed) when I try to put him down (day or night) I often wait 10-20 mins after the end of a feed so he is well asleep then try to transition him to either Moses or next to me crib. He seems to instantly stir or to stir within 5 mins each time. This has been particularly bad for the last 3 weeks now. He won’t go down after 2am each night which is becoming brutally hard to deal with. I know these are often just phases but if anyone has any tips of ways to help then please suggest.

He now doesn’t consistently fall asleep on me and the only way to get him to nap is to drive around, often takes 20mins of screaming in the car seat before he goes off. He will occasionally go off in his pram but that’s hit and miss.

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Gardener11 profile image
Gardener11
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11 Replies
StarsAllAround profile image
StarsAllAround

Hi Gardener I have no advice my little one is 3 months old and exactly the same so jumping on your thred hoping for advice too 😊

Redsequin profile image
Redsequin

Hi lovely. Transitioning to the crib on an angle and putting down feet, bum head can help. If head hits the crib first, they startle. Also putting down for naps in a dark room, with white noise on.

Gardener11 profile image
Gardener11 in reply toRedsequin

thanks, yes I do this but still he seems to startle, I maybe just need to try and be softer?! I always have white noise on but haven’t done a dark room in the day so can give that a go.

Redsequin profile image
Redsequin in reply toGardener11

yes the dark room helps, I find. Honestly though they do just go through phases where it’s nigh on impossible for a while. Sending solidarity. It’s so tough

PenguinBlue profile image
PenguinBlue

hello, echo the above on dark room / white noise and also bum first / head last - I was useless at it but my husband was a pro and putting him down, he’d sort of rock him as he lowered him 🤷🏽‍♀️. Would also recommend a swaddle if you’re not using one already - keeps them nice and secure and less likely to be startled.

For walks, I got a portable white noise machine on Amazon and a snoozeshade which darkens the environment (possibly helpful in the sunshine we’re having now too) which might help your walking naps!

Also to say, we did have phases where he wouldn’t go down after a night feed no matter what we both tried and in those situations I would co sleep (safely) just to get some sleep as it’s so brutal if you can’t catch up.

the other thing to try is see how you get on settling him in the crib after a feed, either keeping a hand on him and singing etc - this helped my son occasionally at the beginning and over time he worked out how to put himself to sleep.

Gardener11 profile image
Gardener11

thank you lots of helpful points. Useful to hear as well that you had phases were they just wouldn’t go down.

TheBearsInFargo profile image
TheBearsInFargo

Hi, we were in the exact same situation and we ended up going to a sleep consultant (Julia Fensom) for help. This did involve having to do some sleep training, but you can decide which method you want to use, including very gentle methods. It depends if the cost of a sleep consultant is affordable for you at the moment but we found it to be the best money we’ve spent-it completely turned things around from just surviving to actually enjoying each day with our baby. If the sleep consultant isn’t affordable, there is also a book which lays out all the options for sleep training, it’s called: Your Sleepless Baby: The Rescue Guide. Hope that helps

alileeeeee profile image
alileeeeee

Hi,

I would say it will all pass in the end. I have a 8 month old baby and he wouldn't really have proper and long sleeps until reaching 6 months.

If got chances can try taking baby out more, it will help them sleep to some extent. Also its quite important to get someone else to help, if you can.

YonnaPeaches profile image
YonnaPeaches

Hi Gardener,

Just to say I’m sorry you’re in this position. My first was exactly the same and it is tough! it’s so exhausting being needed all the time and equally frustrating when you think they’re so asleep they won’t stir when you put them down and then their little eyes open! It brought me to tears numerous times so I hope you’re being gentle with yourself too!

I know there’s so much advice out there about getting them to sleep in their cot through the day etc but ultimately you’ve just got to find something that works for you. Neither of mine have napped in their bed as they used to stir on transition. We use the pushchair for all our naps, which I’ve personally found really helpful as they always have that familiar space wherever you are. I’ve also found that consistency is key, Eg using exactly the same white noise each time, sing the same songs or rock etc (whatever you find works for your little one). The final thing I’ve found really helpful is learning about nap gaps. (You can just google this). Once I’d heard about this, I discovered that I was leaving it too long especially between first wake and first nap. My baby was mainly over tired which is why she wouldn’t go down!

Also to say my second is 6 1/2 months now and her daytime sleep was a lot like yours until around 5 months. Now I’m finding things are settling with being consistent and her night time sleep is (TOUCH WOOD) improving!

Sorry long response! I really hope you find something that works for you! You’ve got this 💪🏻💪🏻

Xx

Gardener11 profile image
Gardener11 in reply toYonnaPeaches

thank you I will check out nap gaps 😊

Sinksinka profile image
Sinksinka

Hi Gardener11, I am sorry about what you're going through. I went through something similar but it was for two weeks. The thing I learned was

Firstly, Baby needed to see my face and touch my face to feel safe and fall asleep. Too much light is stimulating but I kept a dim lighted room which was perfect for her so she could see me when I was off the bed.

Secondly. I put Cerelac Rice in her milk. Its a brand I dont know if you get it there but basically a thickner from 4 months onwards. I didnt realise that milk was not keeping her full enough and hence she couldnt go into deep sleep. She would wake up every 20 mins, annoyed, irritated and sleepy. She was filling her stomach with so much formula because she was hungry but never being satiated. At the end, the one scoop of cereal thickner filled her stomach and she would go into deep sleep. She is 7 months now and I still do it for her night feeds. It keeps her asleep for a good 4 hours at a time.

Thirdly, she needed contact to feel secure. So I started sleeping her in the bed next to me. I have a super king size bed so my husband was far away so as not to roll over. I kept her above my face level so my arms wouldnt hit her and threw away all excess pillows and throws. Keeping her at my face level or above also ensured that my blanket never covered her face. She till date falls asleep very securely knowing that her mama or papa is at an arms distance. You can try a 'next to me' cot and bring it to your bed so you can touch her while she is sleeping. Its worth the investment. I hope my experience helps.

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